ROW80 Round Three: Intentions.....

Well today I got an email from ROW80. Back in January I joined up and started trying to reach my goals.                 That lasted about a month and a half before it petered out and then I completely skipped Round Two. I don’t know whether it was because I was burnt out from writing my novel, fed up with writing in general or just pure laziness on my part. I realised though, when I received that email today that I should really get back on that. I have been writing recently but not enough as I used to. Again I’m wondering whether it’s burn out or sheer laziness. With the start of Round Three though I’m going to step up and try to reach my goals once more.

It is with this in mind that I lay out my intent here, on the internet, for all to see. My intent behind restarting my RoW80 goals is to fulfil a number of needs. The first is to write more. It’s simple, but effective. I’ve not been writing as much as I want and if I want to become a professional writer I need to get into writing every day, even if it’s just a little. The second need is to push myself. I have a lot of free time at the minute and I know that as soon as I get a job I’m going to wish I had used it more effectively. I hate the feeling of regret so by pushing myself to reach the goals of Round Three I might be able to prevent it before it’s even begun. The third is simply to give myself more direction in how I spend my time. I spend so much of my day bored, surfing the internet that it just seems a waste and these goals will help me use my time more efficiently and effectively. The fourth and final need is to push me to complete the things I want to do that aren’t that fun but necessary for my chosen career dream. Even if it’s writing a synopsis, editing existing novels, planning new ones or even working on the scripts of projects that have fallen by the wayside. I’m going to push myself to work on them all, even if I don’t really want to because they are necessary.

So that’s it. My intent is laid out clear and simple. The third Round starts at the beginning of July so in the next few days I’m going to think long and hard about the goals I’m going to set myself on the first post. They need to be clear, measurable but not overly fixed. I think I know them already actually. Now it’s a matter of just writing them down and checking them out. They won’t be all focused on writing though, I know that much.

Must We Suffer For Our Art?

This morning I found myself watching Sex and the City. It got me to thinking; do we, as artists, writers and creators need to suffer for our art to be truly great?

I ask this because, when you think about it, the greatest works of history, the greatest works of our time were all created when the artist or writer was at their lowest ebb. Take J K Rowling for instance. She was living in a council flat, newly divorced and surviving on benefits when she first wrote Harry Potter. Now she is a multi-millionaire with a happy marriage and a successful writing career. Virginia Wolfe struggled with depression for much of her adult life, eventually taking her own life but during her weakest moments she wrote some wonderful novels and even established a printing press to get them out to the public. Vincent Van Gogh was a great painter, ranging from realism to surrealism and everything in between but his personal life was a shambles with several failed relationships and one break up so devastating he went so far as to cut off his ear. J R R Tolkien took his experiences in the trenches of World War 1, the horror, the atrocities and the camaraderie and turned it into what is possibly one of the greatest works of the 20^th Century, the Lord of the Rings.

So, the question is, do modern writers and artists truly need to suffer great emotional upheaval to create great works? Or is that now a thing of the past? Is it the emotional trauma that pushes us to reach our true potential? When I’m writing or drawing I can feel that there is more there, something more than what I can do. And yet it won’t come out. It’s as though there’s a door blocking the way and I don’t have the key. I can’t help but wonder if maybe the key is emotional suffering, that I need something to shake me to my core in order for me to break through this door and create that which I’m truly capable of. Or it may simply be wishful thinking on my part, who knows.

What do you think?

A Good Week

Well.... what can I say about this week?

On Monday I started reading again, specifically a bunch of Darren Shan books, mostly his Saga of Darren Shan series. First off, I love them and I love how they develop. The gradually get darker and darker as the character of Darren delves deeper and deeper into the realms of the Vampires and the Vampeneze. Initially I got these books on my Kindle because I’d seen the movie ‘Cirque du Freak’, based on the first couple of novels, and really quite enjoyed it, even if it was a little childish at times. The books though are almost entirely different. Things happen a lot slower but you can see the plots growing and getting more and more complex as Darren ages and learns more about his new people. The film, in comparison, shoves huge chunks of the novels together, giving Darren his nemesis almost instantly and revealing almost all the information about the character of Mr Tiny within the first hour. Characters are switched around, brought in too early, completely left out or just created out of nowhere (You know who I’m talking about little monkey-girl).

Secondly, about the books, they helped me realise something about my own writing. You may know if you’ve read my archives, numerous as they are (*cough*) that I’ve been having trouble editing my completed novel. Since I’ve started working on the first page I’ve always felt that something wasn’t quite right about it. When I was reading the Shan Saga, as I refer to it, I realised that it was possible that I was using the wrong perspective. So I switched it around. I’ve spent this week rewriting my manuscript in 1^st person and already I’m seeing an improvement in the writing.
The trouble with my story is that it’s somewhat of a mystery. I’ve got some characters that know everything, some that only know parts and one that hasn’t a clue what’s going on. The temptation with writing all that in third person though is to reveal too much. All too often I found myself writing exposition that wasn’t needed or was coming too soon, now that I’ve switched perspectives though I’ve stopped that happening. The reader is only told as much as my main character knows, which at the end of the day, isn’t an awful lot. I’m actually starting to believe that I’m going to be able to finish editing this novel and make another step down the path to being published. 

I’ve also been working on my newest web-comic idea oSaM. The script was finished at the beginning of May and I’m now halfway through the edits/rewrites. It’s a fun thing to do and it feels like it’s going the way I want again. It’s also helping me stay inspired about the story itself and while I’m rewriting I keep coming across all these things about my characters that I didn’t know. It’s a lot of fun.

I’ve been drawing as well while I rewrite, sketching my characters and mostly doing anatomy studies. While I’m still unsure about the style I plan to use a good grasp of anatomy is essential when drawing any form of humanoid. In the past I’ve not bothered trying to learn and as a result my characters have looked odd and out of proportion. Now though I’m happy to say that even in my most cartoony of styles they’re looking normal and it’s easy to take a step towards imagining them in reality.

Basically, I’ve had a good week full of creativity.

There is a big painting bubbling away in the back of my mind though so who knows, next week I might even be able to talk about that.

Ciao.

On Writer's Block and Real Life

I’ve not posted much in the past few weeks, I know that. The main reason for this is the complete lack of motivation I’ve felt recently. I’ve mentioned writer’s block before, in several posts in the past, saying that it’s just an excuse for being purely lazy. In the recent weeks though I’ve come to realise that there may be more to it than just laziness. 

Life has a way of getting to us all. We all have different coping mechanisms, some people find new relationships, others take up exercise and others still find a new hobby. My coping mechanism seems to be that I lose any motivation to write, or if I am writing I don’t want to talk about it. I’ve been jobless for the past three months. This may not seem too bad, particularly in light of the economic situation at the minute, but job searching has a way of getting to you. The constant applications and rejections slowly start to wear down at my self esteem, making me feel more and more like a failure. I lose the motivation not just to apply for jobs but for a lot of other things, including writing and drawing. I’ve felt myself slipping into that black hole of despair that many writers and artists teeter on the edge of and in the past week or so I’ve clawed my way back into the sunlight.

I managed to finish the Script Frenzy script, I’ve been writing random one-shots based in that universe for a group I’ve joined on LiveJournal and I’m starting to feel a whole lot better about myself. Part of this is due to simple comments on my writing that I’ve received through the group, little things like they like certain parts of the stories or random little nuggets of the text that I slipped in because my mind goes a little loopy after 8pm. I even got a call yesterday about a job. Unfortunately I wasn’t able to get it as it would require me to have a driving license which I sadly lack but the fact that that was the only thing holding me back from it just served to reassure me.

But the fact of the matter is that I did get writer’s block and lost all motivation. But it wasn’t because I’m lazy and not because I believe that the creative muse is a fickle beast that flitters off like a butterfly at inappropriate times but because I’m human and I got sad. It’s something to think about and it has really made me realise how much life can affect us all in ways we didn’t even realise.

So, as I sit here on this rainy Thursday afternoon I ask that you remember this when decrying writer’s block. It’s a large generic term that too often gets used as an excuse but when it comes down to it writer’s block is a cover all term that simply says that the writer can’t write. Not because the ideas aren’t there but because there’s something else going on in their lives. Distractions are things that will and do happen to us all.

It’s life after all. Live it.